The Yellow Light
by katieupatree
Summary: Jane had expected a lot of things from Lisbon when he returned from prison, but this certainly wasn't one of them. Will a night spent in 'his' attic fix all that he so carelessly damaged? Based upon Samson by Regina Spektor. Post season 3 finale.
1. One

Hello there!  
>Just in case you haven't read any of my stories before, i am Katie and i thank you very much for taking the time to read what i so love to write :)<p>

This will be a little different from what i normally write, as i very much like stories with lots of chapters, but after friday i won't have a spare minute for writing :'( But, before school & work swallow me up, i thought a little two or three chapter story was called for.

It is set after the season three finale, but is pure fiction from then on.  
>Also, it is based upon one of my favourite songs of the minute; Samson, by Regina Spektor ..so please, if you are able to, have a listen as you read. It will still make sense if you cannot though.<p>

That's enough from me now! I hope you enjoy..

_Disclaimer: The Mentalist belongs to it's rightful owners, as do all of the beautiful characters who are a part of the show. _  
><em>Regina Spektor owns her music &amp; lyrics, i am merely a little in love with them.<em>

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><p><strong>The Yellow Light<br>****Chapter One  
><strong>

A week ago Teresa Lisbon had been stood in exactly the same spot as she was right now. Had looked into the same room. Had smelt the same night sky, through same the damp walls. Had been illuminated by the same moon that shone through the same wood laden windows. And yet, not a single thing of this night was the same as it were a week ago. Seven days had seemingly changed the course of history, or perhaps they had simply gotten it back on track. Seven days that were singularly not of great importance, but together, they had managed to right the wrongs of the world. Seven days. One hundred and sixty eight hours. Ten thousand and eighty minutes. A short time in the grand scheme of things. And yet, Teresa Lisbon was certain that the past week was perhaps the most important time of her life. Seven days ago the world had been bleak and her life was slowly becoming unbearable. Nothing could lift the darkness that had fallen. Nothing could have saved her. Today that had all changed. The light had truly flooded her senses, and nothing had ever felt so wonderful. It was as if she had been living under a mask her whole life, and only now was she allowed to feel the warmth that the world could bring. The room might have been exactly the same, but there was one unmistakable and heart warming difference. A difference that came in the shape of Patrick Jane. His suite was a little too crumpled. His hair had grown too long. His complexion far too pale. But none of that mattered; at least not right now. Because he was here, and he was free. Patrick Jane was back where he belonged.

Patrick Jane was a free man. A murder he so publicly committed had been wiped from his name. A guilt he should have been made to feel had been lifted from his mind. He wasn't sure how, and he wasn't sure why, but he was indeed a free man. He was certain that it had something to do with the beautiful senior agent currently stood in the door frame to the attic. He was certain she had saved him. Teresa Lisbon, who so adamantly fought for what was good; for what was right, had saved his murderous soul. And for that, he would be eternally grateful. She had always told him that he had a choice; that he didn't have to become the man that Red John was daring him to be. He had always told her the truth; that nothing could change his mind about killing the bastard that stole the lives of his beloved wife and child. They had danced around the subject for years. Neither willing to give into the other. Neither strong enough to convince the other that they were right. She had vowed to stop him. He had known she never could. Patrick Jane would kill Red John. Teresa Lisbon would be there to pick up the pieces after it was done. It was their own unspoken compromise. Jane doubted he would ever know the extent of what she had done for him; what of herself she had compromised to set him free. Lisbon would never allow the truth to be revealed.

He had felt the air change as she appeared in the door frame some minutes ago. The dampness in the air was replaced by her warn scent; a scent that held a deep and beautiful quality that could never be quite described. His breath hitched as he felt her forest eyes searching his entire being. He knew she would notice the little changes in him; his appearance was wrong, but it was so slight that he was sure she would be the only one to really see it. Lisbon was far more observant than she was given credit for, especially when it came to her team. And it was that precise reason that he knew that she was aware that he was, as always, only pretending to be asleep.

'_Your hair is long_.' The statement seemed to shake her whole body. The mere act of talking was too much. This night was too much. Never had she been so pleased to see a man lying on a settee in her whole life. Just to know that he was here; that he was safe, it was too much for her shattered heart to take. The bullet had stopped Red John's heart from beating. It had ripped through his skin, and his muscles, and his veins. It had cracked his bones. It had torn every last breath from his lungs. It had left his body an empty shell. It had killed him. But it had destroyed Lisbon too. It had shattered her heart into a million unfixable pieces. It had made it all real. The promise of vengeance. The need for revenge. It all centred around a 9mm chunk of metal. Knowing what it meant for Jane. Knowing what the future now held. It had done far worse that kill a man. And for that, she had never been so angry in her whole life. She felt betrayed. Left behind. Forgotten. So angry, but at the same time so relieved to see him. She didn't trust herself to speak anymore. He head and heart were seemingly screaming different things, and she wasn't sure which would find their way to her tongue first.

'_They wouldn't let me cut it.' _Jane wasn't sure why they were talking about his hair. There were so many things that he needed to say to her; needed to tell her, and yet they were talking about his hair. But then, what had he expected? In all honesty, he had no idea. He had spent hours upon hours contemplating what Lisbon's reaction to seeing him would be, and had never been able to figure out an answer. She was an enigma. Infuriatingly impossible to read, and seemingly immune to his skills of observation. In the cold reality they now found themselves, his hair was a perfectly reasonable topic of conversation.

They had remained in an odd sort of stalemate for what seemed like centuries; neither one brave enough to risk pulling down the dam that was so precariously stitched together, and sure to crumble at their feet if the spoke what needed to be said. The flood that followed would consume them within seconds, and both feared that their shattered hearts wouldn't survive the fall. To open your heart to someone; to share your deepest sentiments with them, that takes the greatest faith of all. Something which neither was sure they had anymore.  
>But then Jane stood up from the old worn out settee, and cerulean eyes searched out emerald orbs across the darkness. The look they shared saying more than any words would ever be able to. Each was battling an internal monologue of fear and desperation. Of needing to tell the other how they felt. Of wanting to protect themselves from more pain. And so they were stuck; two people who used to share the whole world, couldn't find a single thing to say to each other. The moon and stars battled against the street lamps below. The air grew thick with anticipation. The wind grew cold and wild against the heat radiating from their damaged hearts. The whole world seemed to be waiting for them to speak. For one man. For one woman. And for the inevitable earth shattering events that were destined to occur as soon as the next word was breathlessly uttered.<p>

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><p>To be continued..<p>

Please let me know what you thought? Good or bad.  
>Thank you ever so much for reading &amp; i shall see you all soon, Katie x<p> 


	2. Two

Hello everyone :)  
>Moving quickly on to chapter two..<p>

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><p><strong>The Yellow Light<br>Chapter Two**

And then suddenly the world didn't need to wait anymore. The Earth began turning again. The lights shone. The wind blew. The night welcomed the life that sparked all around them, and the world braced itself for whatever may come next. Lisbon's feet, that had seemed so rooted to the ground moments ago, were now striding bravely towards the man that didn't quite look himself, and she was sure her brain had not the power to stop them. Her body was being led by her heart, and yet her mind was ever determined to fight back. Her heart that wanted to cling tightly to his chest, and feel his strong arms at her back. Her heart that needed him so much closer; needed to be swallowed whole by his deliciously unique scent. Her heart that had missed him with every beat in the weeks that they had been separated. Her heart that had always, in one way or another, loved the man that stood before her. But her brain; her ever rational and compartmentalised brain, was screaming bloody murder inside of her head. Her brain that remembered the pain of her heart and the horror of having him gone. Her brain that was fuelled by an anger that burned so bright it threatened to consumer her entirely. Her brain that knew she couldn't simply melt into his arms and expect everything to be alright. Her brain that was determined to fight her corner and tell him how terribly stupid and selfish he had been. With each step Lisbon was more and more confused. She always had a plan; always knew what the next move had to be, at least, she had used to. But this man; this infuriatingly wonderful man, had her well and truly stumped. Lisbon had not a clue what she was going to do once she was stood before him; and she was vastly running out of time to decide. One more step and she would be there; looking up at his tired features and too long hair. So she took in a deep breath; stepped forwards with as much confidence as she could muster, and decided to simply go with whatever her body decided.

Patrick Jane was truly in shock; the unmistakably ring of her soft hand contacting hard against his rough cheek vibrated off of the walls and shook him to the very core. She had slapped him. Teresa Lisbon had slapped him with a strength he had always known she possessed. And even though his face stung with the fire of a thousand flickering candles, he took a moment to enjoy the pain. Because it meant that she was ok. That he hadn't broken her entirely. Teresa Lisbon had always been so full of fight and passion, and he had feared that he may have been the one to destroy that. Jane had spent almost every waking moment that he was in prison wishing that he could just make sure that she was still the Lisbon that she had been before he had changed their lives forever. He should have known that she was far stronger than that; that she would never let his actions determine the rest of her life. Teresa Lisbon was independence personified, and only a very foolish man would doubt that. And if there was one thing Jane hoped to never be, it was foolish.

'_I'm sorry_.'  
>'<em>I deserved it<em>.'  
>Their words seemed to tumble out into the night at the same time; emotion dripping from even the simplest of letters. And then they were ghostly silent again. Staring deep into each other's eyes; searching for a sign on the life they once knew. A flicker of the people who had spent so many nights huddled up in this forgotten attic together; with tea for him, and coffee for her.<br>And once again it was her that took the first leap, if only to stop herself from falling mercilessly into his arms and curling deep into their warmth.  
>'<em>I had meant to just talk, but then you were so much closer than i thought you would be, and i just felt so angry. You make me so much angrier than i ever thought possible Jane. You stupid, selfish man, who never even stopped to think about what would happen to everyone else. What would happen to me. You just go through life doing exactly as you please and you never even look back to make sure that everyone else is still ok. You just keep on going, and going, and.. and i, i..<em>' Lisbon's breath was ragged and painful, and tears threatened to silence her altogether, but she had started speaking, and she refused to stop before she had said all that needed to be said, '_and i can't run as fast as you. I can't keep up with you. I try so hard to always be next to you; to run right alongside you, no matter how dangerous the road ahead appears to be. But i can't run as fast as you. You left me behind. You left me here, and you didn't even tell me where you were going. I could have helped. We could have caught him together. But you were so damn determined to get your revenge that you didn't even tell me what was happening. I know i have always said that i wouldn't let you do it; that i wouldn't let you kill him, but i think that i would have. I gave up on trying to stop you a long time ago, but Jane, i never stopped helping you. I never left you behind. I thought we were a team. I thought you trusted me. I thought.. i though you loved me. Because Jane, even though you are the most infuriating man on Earth, i have always trusted you. I have always loved you._'  
>No. She had not just said that. She hadn't meant to say that. She hadn't even known she felt that. Tears left salty tracks across her translucent cheeks and her eyes burned so hot she could barely see. Her breath tugged at her chest as she desperately tried to suck in the damp air. She searched for his eyes; for the key to his very soul, and found them filled with far more than she could ever interpret. Fear. Longing. Sadness. Guilt. Grief. Pain. Suffering. But what did any of that matter? All she wanted to see was love; to know that she wasn't alone in her confession. It wasn't something she had ever witnessed before. It wasn't an emotion she had ever truly felt before she had met him. All she needed was a sign. The briefest flicker of love in his magical eyes. The anticipation was literally crushing her; it seemed as if she had been searching out his heart for centuries, when in reality it had been a mere heartbeat ago. She just needed him to love her back. But she couldn't ask. Couldn't speak. Couldn't move. It was his turn now; the cards were in his hands. It was now or never. Teresa Lisbon had exposed her heart in the most beautifully vulnerable way imaginable. Patrick Jane simply needed to find the courage to do the same.<p>

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><p>To be continued..<p>

Please let me know what you thought? Reviews do truly mean the world to me.  
>&amp; thank you to those who left one for the first chapter. As always, thank you very much for reading.<br>Stay tuned, Katie.


	3. Three

Hello everyone.. i hope you are all well?  
>We're onto the last chapter of my little story, so i hope you enjoy..<p>

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><p><strong>The Yellow Light<br>Chapter Three**

Jane could hardly stand to look into her ever searching eyes; he knew his own were a mess with what seemed like every single emotion he had ever felt, and he feared that she would see too much. That she would see him as a monster; as a murderer, and then she would be gone. He would be alone in this damp smelling attic with only his own mind for company; and that was something he wouldn't survive. But he should have known better. He should have known that she wouldn't run. Teresa Lisbon had told him all that he needed to know. It was his turn now. His turn to be even half as brave as she was. His turn to lay his heart on the line, and confess all that he felt.

He gripped tightly to the tops of her arms; as if needing a physical connection to know that she was still there. Still running right beside him. And all she could do was stare up at him, overwhelmed by the fire that was ignited by his firm touch and spreading quickly through her veins. Waiting ever patiently for him to speak. Waiting for the words that could destroy her heart altogether. Hoping for so much more than.

'_I couldn't risk losing you. That is why i went alone. I knew that if i told you where i was going; if you came with me, i would lose you forever. The life that i took, it wasn't that of a man. I looked into his eyes and saw nothing human there. I couldn't stand the thought of those eyes piercing into your beautiful skin. The emptiness filling with the monstrous evil that he lived for. The passion burning as he caught a glimpse of the most important person in my life. No. He had done that once; i wasn't going to let him do it again. It doesn't matter that you would have been safe; that in reality he couldn't have done a thing to you. That i wouldn't have let him hurt you. Just to imagine his eyes on you, it was too much to bear. To know that his vile mind would wander to our shared past; to know that he would long to repeat history, i couldn't stand it Teresa. I trust you with my life. I love you with every ounce of my being. That is why i didn't tell you. That is why i had to run so far ahead. Because he would have won. He would have taken my mind to a place too dark to ever recover from. A place smeared with blood and the metallic scent of death. A place where you were no longer filled with the beauty and passion that i so love you for, but rather a last rattling breath as he stole our future away. If he had seen you, even for a second, i would never be able to forgive myself. He would have won._'

Tears had streamed faster down her face with every beautiful word that he spoke. His hands were gripping so tight to her arms that they had begun to numb. His breath so ragged and hoarse that it scared her a little. His eyes, dark, and so overflowing with fierce passion that she struggled to look into them. And yet it wasn't anguish or fear that she felt. Not a single trace of her anger remained. It was a love far deeper than she ever knew existed. A need to be right here, right now. A desperate longing to be in his arms. She reached up, with trembling hands, to hold his tear streaked face. To reassure him that she was still there. That she was still running right by his side.

'_You will never lose me_.'

It was such a simple statement, and yet never had five words meant so much to Patrick Jane. His vice like grip about her arms loosened, and his palms opened up against the soft material of her shirt. Slowly his hands made their way to the soft curve of her spine; memorising every electricity inducing touch, before they settled low on her back. His eyes flashed quickly to hers; searching for her acceptance. And he saw it; blazing bright against the forest green background. And it was so wonderful. He found hope, and forgiveness, and understanding. He found love. With one last lingering look into her soul, Jane pulled Teresa Lisbon, the woman he loved, as close to him as he possible could. Her hands roamed through his hair; pulling delicately at the outgrown curls. Both breathed in deep as their lips met in a kiss that was so much more than the fireworks of fairy stories. A kiss that the whole world had stopped to watch. A kiss so long awaited that they had feared it may never come. A kiss to build a life time on. And as the night turned silently to dawn, the world once again busied itself with normality. All except for one man, and one woman; who were lost in a kiss warmed by the yellow light.

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><p>The End.<p>

There we have it.  
>Thank you ever so much for reading. I would love to know what you though, so please, leave me a review if you get chance.<p>

I don't know when i will be back with another story, as we are back to school on friday.  
>Probably not until the Christmas holiday.<p>

Until next time, Katie xx


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